It’s Been A Funny Old Day

13. May 2005

Why is it so difficult?
The plane is cancelled
The payment delayed…
All manner of hindrances
Thwart my passage today.

All I wanted was some rest and clarity
And to be with loved ones
Yet not today,
Was it me? What did I say?
Or was it something I somehow neglected?

In the still reaches of my mind I hear calm.
But I feel a storm of angry recrimination.
Lurking like some tethered tornado
Spinning angrily without release or meaning
In an empty place devoid of all recognition.

It is an intriguing feeling.
Meeting the unmet rage triggered
By the feelings of life being needlessly complicated.
Anger, discomfort and confusion…
What do I do now?

Aaaah, I understand…
I do nothing other than enjoy the feelings with curiosity
The complications serve no more than to guide me
To feeling that which I previously classed as discomfort.
It seems all really is welcome here but I’d been avoiding that.

Darn, I wish I’d asked earlier.

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